If you live in West Palm Beach and have seen what looks to be a crazy man rummaging around your liquor cabinet, no worries. It's just Ozzy Osbourne. You see, he was awarded the key to the city of West Palm Beach. When I was a kid, I actually believed that if you received the key to the city it meant you now had the ability to get into any home in that city. And just last week, I found out that wasn't true. I now feel better about not having to hide all my adult material everytime I leave my home.

After biting the head off the key, Ozzy commented about, "seeing if Ozzfest, which was bumped down from a tour to a single date show in Dallas in 2008, and then canceled in 2009, could return to Palm Beach County this year."

Hundreds cheered and chanted, "Ozzy! Ozzy! Ozzy!", as the rocker retreated to his SUV and took advantage of a Florida Highway Patrol escort to his next stop, the Barnes & Noble in Palm Beach Gardens, where he would sign copies of his new autobiography, "I Am Ozzy."

That's when things got a little...foggy.

19 year old Nathan Moser got busted, disgusted and is never to be trusted.

Officers saw Nathan smoking marijuana in the store around 8pm. When the officers approached, he took off running. The officers caught Nathan and found what appeared to be homemade fireworks during a search of his backpack. A bomb squad was called to the book store, and the fireworks were taken away to be disposed of.

This idiot was charged with possession of marijuana with intent to sell, possession of narcotic equipment and possession of explosives. He was released from Palm Beach County Jail Saturday, minus the weed and weapons of mass destruction, after posting a $8,000 bond.

The city of West Palm Beach missed the boat big time on this one. They could have taken advantage of the opportunity to kill two birds with one stone by presenting Ozzy with the key to the city and then award Nathan Moser the biggest moron EVER in the state of Florida. And considering this is Florida we are talking about, Nathan Moser has a lot of competition for this honor. Did he actually think no one would notice he was smoking weed in the middle of a Barnes & Noble? Plus, Ozzy pulled a "Tom." Do you remember during those Tom & Jerry's cartoons when Tom would smell food, and the scent was so powerful that it would levitate him straight to the source. Well, that is what happened with Ozzy. Ozzy was looking to unload his worthless key for something worth wild.

Here is some classic Tom & Jerry for ya! The watching experience is 1000 times
more hilarious when you throw marijuana into the mix, so I hear.


Next Page...Un-Soberity Is Bank!

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